A traveller's fear
October 27th 2007 02:20
This is a little out of alignment for what I have been writing about, but I can't help it. It's that time of the year and I just can't avoid thinking about it.
As a traveller, I don't fear terrorism, I don't fear getting out of my comfort zone. What I fear the most is having a family and children.
Everywhere you go there are babies everywhere. It must be a winter/spring thing. Yesterday I went to the hospital to visit a high school friend whom I haven't seen for a whole 10 years, she's just given birth to a boy and I thought it would be a good opportunity to visit and catch up.
The boy was beautiful. Little, as babies are, but already possess good looks of his parents. As friends do, I was asked what I have been up to in the last ten years.
There went the usual reply - "Oh, just been studying, travelling, found a job and now working and travelling as much as time and money allows, you know."
Well, she didn't know, because she had spent the past ten years finishing her studies, started a small business and raising a child, now - two children.
That made me realise - geez, is that what I'll eventually become? That's pretty scary. Human children take at least 14 years to become independent. If I ever have a baby, that's 14 years without being able to travel the way I do now, without the independence of just get up and go. That's 14 long years of being stuck being a mum. Or in some cases, even more years until you can kick them out to their own apartments.
I am not sure if I am ready for that kind of life yet. My partner certainly have been talking about babies, being the uncle of 3 little ones in his family, he is fond of them. I am still un-sure.
I wonder if this is something that's on every travel bug's minds? I mean, I have a cat, and I feel bad enough to put her in Cat Boarding everytime we go off on an adventure. You can't put children in boarding, you just get criticised as bad parents.
They all say it's your choice, and you can still do what you want. Unfortunately women are still physically limited, even if they claim women now have equal opportunities as men today. Being pregnant means a lot of things - you get bigger by the day, you get into mood swings, and in late pregnancy you are less likely to be backpacking through the jungles just in case you might be giving birth with the aid of a witch doctor by accident.
And then the baby comes - it's a joy and cute to start with before the sleepless nights kick in, the need to change nappies eight times a day, the mid-night feedings... and then they grow up, learn how to kick and create havoc anywhere they go... the only travelling entailed visiting family caravan parks during school holidays. Even if you do take them overseas to exotic places, they are less likely to appreciate it and mostly likely to forget it. Just as I did when my parents insist that I have been to Hawaii. When I was only two years old.
Not to mention the crying and the yelling of impatient children on the planes - I can't bear to do that to my fellow passangers.
For someone who's aim is to have visited every single country (properly, and not just passing by) before she dies - this all scares me greatly.
Do you feel the same?
As a traveller, I don't fear terrorism, I don't fear getting out of my comfort zone. What I fear the most is having a family and children.
Everywhere you go there are babies everywhere. It must be a winter/spring thing. Yesterday I went to the hospital to visit a high school friend whom I haven't seen for a whole 10 years, she's just given birth to a boy and I thought it would be a good opportunity to visit and catch up.
The boy was beautiful. Little, as babies are, but already possess good looks of his parents. As friends do, I was asked what I have been up to in the last ten years.
There went the usual reply - "Oh, just been studying, travelling, found a job and now working and travelling as much as time and money allows, you know."
Well, she didn't know, because she had spent the past ten years finishing her studies, started a small business and raising a child, now - two children.
That made me realise - geez, is that what I'll eventually become? That's pretty scary. Human children take at least 14 years to become independent. If I ever have a baby, that's 14 years without being able to travel the way I do now, without the independence of just get up and go. That's 14 long years of being stuck being a mum. Or in some cases, even more years until you can kick them out to their own apartments.
I am not sure if I am ready for that kind of life yet. My partner certainly have been talking about babies, being the uncle of 3 little ones in his family, he is fond of them. I am still un-sure.
I wonder if this is something that's on every travel bug's minds? I mean, I have a cat, and I feel bad enough to put her in Cat Boarding everytime we go off on an adventure. You can't put children in boarding, you just get criticised as bad parents.
They all say it's your choice, and you can still do what you want. Unfortunately women are still physically limited, even if they claim women now have equal opportunities as men today. Being pregnant means a lot of things - you get bigger by the day, you get into mood swings, and in late pregnancy you are less likely to be backpacking through the jungles just in case you might be giving birth with the aid of a witch doctor by accident.
And then the baby comes - it's a joy and cute to start with before the sleepless nights kick in, the need to change nappies eight times a day, the mid-night feedings... and then they grow up, learn how to kick and create havoc anywhere they go... the only travelling entailed visiting family caravan parks during school holidays. Even if you do take them overseas to exotic places, they are less likely to appreciate it and mostly likely to forget it. Just as I did when my parents insist that I have been to Hawaii. When I was only two years old.
Not to mention the crying and the yelling of impatient children on the planes - I can't bear to do that to my fellow passangers.
For someone who's aim is to have visited every single country (properly, and not just passing by) before she dies - this all scares me greatly.
Do you feel the same?
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Comment by Michaelie
Flick Wit
Michaelie
Comment by Ash
Australian Traveller
Flashes of memories
oooh I`m kinda at this crossroads myself at the moment. Wondering whether it`s time to hang up the hiking boots for a while and be responsible and get a mortgage and a proper job or say what the hell and book a ticket to go around the world.
As you say time is marching when it comes to having kids - that`s the only thing that really puts me off. I don`t want to decide when it`s too late that i have made a mistake and cannot have them.
I don`t know the answer really. I look forward to hearing what others have to say too
Ash
Comment by AmyHuang
Sydney Table
Project Job Search
Travel Debate
Travel String
Love Adventures
Thanks for dropping by. I am glad I am not the only one thinking that way. If I were to choose and with no need to consider anything else - the ticket to go around the world and never come back would be the obvious option.